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Monthly Archives: March 2014

Snow Tires & Infidels

Dad took a drive up to Estes Park yesterday.  There was NO Snow.  He complained that there was NO Snow.  “I don’t know who these weather people think they’re kidding – there’s no snow up there!  NO Snow on the roads, NO Snow on the grass, NO Snow at all.”

That lead to a conversation about driving in the snow…that went something like this:

“You know your Uncle Joe always said you get better traction when you drive fast in the snow.  I suppose the speed helps with your traction because the speed heats up the tread on the tires and when those tread expand they grab the snow better.  The problem is stopping.  So if you can drive somewhere in the snow without stopping, fast is better.  I wonder when I’ll be too old to drive, hell I may be too old to drive now!  At least in this country with these silly drivers.”

The other topic of conversation yesterday – he cancelled his Internet and Home Phone.  And we just got him to the point where he was somewhat self-sufficient with online bill pay.  But, he’s on a mission to save money again.  After talking to the customer support department for over an hour, twice, he’s decided that the country needs to form a mutiny against cable companies.  (not a bad idea)   His quote, “The reason we pay so much, and the reason our bills are so screwed up – is because they hire a bunch of infidels that don’t know what they’re doing.”  (incompetent = infidel??)  “She tried to tell me she could lower my bill, but I told her that if I have to call every month to remind her what my bill is SUPPOSED to be, I’d just rather cancel.  Does she think I have nothing better to do than call her every month?”

So he showed them!  He now has no internet.  This morning I was on the phone with dad at 7:00 am checking his internet banking, checking his online credit card statement, checking his credit card points….maybe I’m his new internet.  This won’t last long.




Phone call 3/12/14

Dad called Kim at work this morning… here’s how it went…

Dad: “When you get a chance, I want you to come over to my house and get rid of channel 9. They’re as bad as Obamacare, those liberal bastards! I can’t go that anymore!”

Kim: “OK.. on your computer?”

Dad: “Yeah, yeah… I don’t know how to do all that favorite stuff…”